- Everything that happens in your life that you don’t want is someone else’s fault - be it your parents, teachers , old boss, an ex or whoever or what ever, if you are holding on to the hurt you are giving your power to the past and allowing it to influence your present. When we blame others we are putting the responsibility of our feelings on them.
- You are people pleasing, putting everyone else needs first, not feeling worthy of their love or that they will accept you for who you are. Hiding your feelings and putting on a show that everything is great when inside you are falling apart. Not being true to YOU
- Not believing in yourself or accepting yourself. How you feel about yourself is an indicator of how much power you hold. Feel great about yourself warts and all = standing in your power. Feel C.R.A.P about yourself is an indication that you are giving your power away.
How to get it back Having boundaries in place , not walls. Having healthy boundaries comes from feeling good about ourselves “No One Can Make You Feel Bad About Yourself Without Your Permission” what thoughts came into your head when you read that sentence…………… taking responsibility for our own feelings and reactions, we can master our Ability to Respond rather react to others.
Once we have awareness of our feelings, our triggers we are in a much more powerful place. We realise we have a choice in how we feel and it up to us to decide if we want to feel good or bad.
Those who respond with anger ( something I work really hard on, as at times I’ll react without thinking when its someone I really care about, hits a sore point in me & bang I’m off, exploding over something minor, I could easily blame my parents as its a learned behaviour but in that moment its my choice) don’t want to feel the pain in their bodies so they externalise it and direct it at someone else.
The signs can be rubbing the chest or neck which is a self soothing mechanism that we do to ease the pain. Having an awareness of our behaviour and triggers helps us recognise when we are not been true to ourselves.
Lesson in Life
A wise man sat in the audience and cracked a joke. Everybody laughs like crazy. After a moment, he cracks the same joke again. This time, less people laughed. He cracked the same joke again and again. When there was no laughter in the crowd He smiled and said: You can’t laugh at the same joke again and again, but why do you keep crying over the same thing over and over again ?